GOSPEL MESSAGE & RECORDING
We are gathered together today: the first Sunday after the Ascension of our Blessed Lord Jesus Christ. We are met with the words of the Apostle Paul in his first letter to the Corinthians in chapters 7 and 9. In chapter 7: 1-2, St. Paul talks about how a man and a woman should have a spouse, albeit because otherwise we might fall into sexual immorality. In chapter 7: 25-34, he talks about those who are married and unmarried. He also talks explicitly about how the unmarried can focus on God; and how the married must focus on their spouse. In chapter 9: 1-10, he mentions that he and Barnabas are not married but that the other apostles are. The content of chapter 7 and 9 are being read today, partial because it is the Sunday of Monks, but also because the Church is attempting to explain the three "journeys" that we all have in life; that is, either we are single, or we are living a celibate life (unmarried), or we are married. These are NO three different paths or roads, but a "journey" that an individual takes on the same road. The Scriptures do not point to singlehood, celibacy, or married-life as being different roads that we take that are isolated from each other; instead, it is the same road that each one has chosen to take. Although the path or road is the same, the journey has different struggles and experiences. Let me explain this a little bit further.
Singlehood:
This is the time when we are most active, trying to find ourselves. Our careers are just starting. We might be looking for a spouse, traveling, simply enjoying being single. I remember traveling a lot, working, figuring out my ministry goals, and hanging out with family and friends.
Life can also be very challenging during these times. Finding a job isn't that easy. Plus, finishing grad school and trying to figure out what you want to do is difficult. Relationships are also a challenge. Maybe we are trying to find that right person, and it's not working out the way we thought it would have. Purity is also an issue during this time because we are young and unattached.
Despite how being single poses challenges, we can strengthen our Blessed Lord to stay strong in our faith and live a life that is pleasing to God. It doesn't have to be a time that we forget God or fall into sexual sin. God calls all single individuals to live holy and understand that it is a time of preparation.
Celibacy: This means that a man or woman has dedicated their lives to God in some form or fashion. Often that means women are entering into a holy order. Men are entering into a monastery and or simply dedicating themselves to the service of the Lord through the ministries of the Church. That's why we have life-long priests and even deacons.
Over time, there has been a misunderstanding that celibacy is the holiest way of life. But this is not true! Celibacy is a journey that a person chooses to take in life, which is a journey to holiness, but it is in no way superior to marriage. Often this is taught in the Church because "intimacy" between a man and a woman is seen as "unholy." It is unholy outside the bounds of marriage; however, it is "holy" and "good" within the bounds of marriage." Having a bond with another person of the opposite sex in marriage can never exclude someone from becoming a saint.
There are specific challenges that a celibate person experiences that can be considered a way of getting closer to God. For example, I suppose there can be a sense of loneliness in celibacy, a greater struggle to fight against the passions and other struggles.
Marriage: Our Blessed Lord taught us that marriage was instituted from the beginning. Marriage is a journey that a person can take with another person of the opposite sex, leading to holiness. Sure, you have a wife, husband, and children---but having to deal with and manage all of these aspects of life can be difficult. There is a lot of sacrifices that go into marriage. It is, at times, a burden and blessing. It comes with the territory. In dealing with our spouse and children, we should become more like Christ – compassionate, loving, etc.
It is absolutely possible to live a saintly life and be married at the same time. Many think that it is impossible. I believe this is the greatest lie that the devil has convinced us of. Why? Because human intimacy that takes place in marriage is considered unholy. Again, intimacy is "holy" and "good" in the eyes of God. In the marriage ceremony of the Orthodox Church, we hear, "And the two shall become one flesh." This isn't spiritual; it is physically. Without physical intimacy, a marriage cannot last. Likewise, the same can be said, of emotional and spiritual. All three are equally important.
Conclusion: In conclusion, single, married and celibate people are all on the same road with different experiences. Neither is greater than the other, but all are a way to holiness. Whatever we choose, we should do our very best to uphold ourselves with dignity and honor for the sake of our Blessed Lord, Jesus Christ.